killing shit
October 13, 2010, 7:25 am
Filed under: dear diary, f-f-f-fiji, hit me on the cantina

Herein lies a centipede- found crawling down a wall, coaxed to the floor, squashed with a rubber thong, wrapped up in newspaper, and burnt. With fire. (Exit centipede.)

Killing a bug is ok with me if it’s a cockroach or a poisonous spider, wiping ants off a kitchen bench is also ok. But squashing a centipede and then burning it in newspaper seemed a little excessive/unnecessary. Also add in that the murderer was Island Boy, (a quiet, reasonable, gentle man) and I was equal parts shocked, dismayed and intrigued. On a much smaller scale it reminded me of a friend of mine (also a reasonable guy) who, when walking on an Australian beach with his girlfriend, saw a brush turkey run out of the scrub. On seeing brush turkey he charged straight for it, caught it and then whipped it around, breaking its neck in one ‘fowl’ swoop. He then dropped the dead bird and turned back ‘all nonchalant-like’ to his stunned gf.  Island Boy may not have murdered the centipede in such circumstances but like a brush turkey just doing his thing on the beach, what’s the real threat of a centipede just doing his thing on the bedroom wall?? Aren’t centipedes kind of like caterpillars? And aren’t caterpillars just hungry for yummy fruits??

And then I googled the shit out of centipedes and found that big ass centipedes can cause big ass anaphylactic shock. While unlikely to be fatal to adults or those with no allergy to bee stings, they can also cause severe swelling, fever and chills- and according to Island Boy these symptoms are best controlled with onion flesh. I wonder if my friends gf is feeling as grateful for having him around…. xx


hold on
October 1, 2010, 12:48 am
Filed under: dear diary, f*shion, hit me on the cantina

so a couple of weeks ago i made the decision to start writing in full sentences and try and keep the stream of conscience + visual diary = blog formula to a minimum. and since then life has been full on and  in full sentences which is why i haven’t posted for awhile.  i’ll update you once things have settled down but for now, i’m going to scroll through the ACNE LOOKBOOK and pretend like everythings ok… xx

i’ve got the beats to make you bang
April 14, 2010, 12:19 pm
Filed under: f*shion, hit me on the cantina

James Blagden

what you say is what you are
March 18, 2010, 6:28 am
Filed under: b&w, hit me on the cantina, snap happy

this isn’t a tax issue is it?
March 17, 2010, 12:36 am
Filed under: dear diary, hit me on the cantina, iloveyoumorethanblackcock

I have this recurring dream where I’m on a yacht with Snoop Dogg and last night a new chapter of the dream unfolded where a friend of mine was Henry Sherman (played by Danny Glover in the Wes Anderson film, The Royal Tenenbaums) and came on board the yacht to help Snoop with his finances. The ‘Dogg” and the “Grizzly Bear” proceeded to “talk some jive” (i love the dialogue between Royal and Henry in the film) and then we had a threesome. Tripped out whackness. I also just found out that Alec Baldwin is the narrator in this film. So now you know. xx

i’m at the bit where my head starts going ‘bam bam bam’
March 13, 2010, 11:17 am
Filed under: dear diary, getting on with it, hit me on the cantina, wild things

fiji farewell, not taking the car back, home on a saturday night, being passive aggressive and totally attractive, holding out, wanting you, proud rainbow family mum, glad the redhead is not dead, that fucking cat next door, dinner, ate myp, small people, cousins, feeling welcome, welcome feeling, sex, sex again, nice. xx

andy-you-and-cass (and i wouldn’t have us any other way)
‘fuck we are so BAD. we always make the worst comments. i hope no one else sees these messages…what if one day you become WHO’s chairwoman or some shit and the internet explodes and the world sees these messages…you’d have to resign…and i’d be hailed as a prophet because i predicted this event at only the age of 27. wooppeee.’