feathers&fables


dear universe- fuck off
March 2, 2010, 2:35 am
Filed under: dear diary, getting on with it, the beginning and the end

i’ve been waiting patiently since september for the universe to decide my fate (i.e. fiji or europe) and now that it has (fiji) there’s even more waiting around. i don’t think it’s the actual waiting- it’s dealing with the shit that comes with waiting- prolonged goodbyes, intermittent relationships that because you’re leaving are supposed to mean nothing, slowly getting rid of/giving away possessions, missing people who have already left (you know who you are- though i’m sure you did your own ‘waiting’), being involved in family decisions (ergh!), tying up loose ends in a job that you’re slowly beginning to detest, blah blah blah, bing bong BORING . indulging in my own frustration is not something i do often (i think/hope)- i’m a big fan of just letting it go (usually with a bottle of wine, a dance, increased use of words like ‘cunt’ and ‘fuck’, or streaming the second season of the O.C and getting to the end where marissa shoots trey and realising that rich kids have problems too.) the point is, as much i love melbourne and my life here, i’m ready to go. i’ve been voted off the island but the tv crew haven’t shuffled me off into a limousine, shot my last video diary entry, and thrown me a big party yet. there’s seventeen days to go and i’m in limbo. xx

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